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Dating Tips

Learn about Body Language:  Generally if you can tell if the person you are interested by body language clues. If he or she is facing you and has legs or feet pointing in your direction then you are an object of interest. If a woman is stroking her hair or fondling clothing then it is quite likely that you have made her feel good about herself.

Dating is a huge part of life, it's a commitment of time and energy all in itself. Read up on the vital instructions and tips for life to make relationships less stressful and dating come more natural.

Another good indicator is if they are leaning towards you. Smiling is probably the best indicator, if the smile is done with a slightly open mouth that is even better.

Perhaps even more than half of all direct human communication is done by body language, understanding how it works and using it to your advantage is a useful skill. This is true in many spheres of activity not just dating.

A word of warning; some people do give out crossed wire signals and in particular women do seem to give out misleading signals in the first few minutes of an encounter.

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Mobile Phones are a turn off: When you are with your date ensure that your phone or tablet is off and out of sight. A study conducted by Dr Andrew Przybylski at the University of Exeter in the UK showed that both women and men are distracted by their presence, aparently just being in the same room with a mobile phone has an effect on empathy and trust, impacting negatively on the relationship. Putting your phone on a restaurant table is very definitely out!

Other THINGS affect dating success; turning up on a date with a guitar case is a good idea according to another study, but a sports bag will be turn off -- ttb

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Dating Safety. There are millions of attractive, and decent people out there, the greater majority of people are genuine, but the Internet Dating Game also attracts some nasty, scary people. The respondent could be someone very different from the one that they present themselves as BE AWARE.

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On the large dating sites there is often a local section e.g. San Diego Dating Site

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How far to go on on that first date? Obviously one wishes to give a good impression but how much of your true self is it wise to reveal the first time you actually meet in the flesh? Some people require more time than others, but everyone, men and women, need to go through several stages. There are five or six discrete stages between that first contact and an enjoyable relaxed intimacy, miss one or more of these stages and it is likely that everything will fall apart.

If you are lucky then perhaps you could get to stage three by the second date. Sex in the early stages is not recommended. It is almost always wishful thinking and if you have too much alcohol and if you misread the signs you will end up looking like an emotionally immature teenage retard. 

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Always take great care and research the person you are communicating with.  It is always a good idea to arrange your early meetings in a public space, in an environment where you can have friends look out for you.

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First Date. A psychology graduate friend (middle aged) admits to a bout of self-stimulation prior to meeting a new lady, he claims that it is the only way that he can prevent the thoughts originating from his lower half from spoiling his encounters. R**** P****** when he reads this will cringe, I know but as a public spirited individual he will understand. -- Friend Indeed

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Make sure that family and friends know where you are. Do not be put off meeting people but take all of the elementary precautions. Trust your instincts. If the person you are meeting is sincere then they will be understanding about your cautiousness. Arrange your own transport, both to and from the venue.

Keep your address secret until you are very sure of the person. No matter how persuasive they are, do not agree to a second meet if you have any doubts.

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Do not talk about your Ex: Doing so will usually be a big turn off. If your date brings up the subject, gently steer the subject away. Say that you are the kind of person that lives in the present.

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Interracial Dating and Relationships: It can be hard work persuading some family members to come to terms with the new partner from other races and colors. One way that I tackled this was to talk about my partners likes and dislikes and interests and tastes. Now all my close family have a view of him that is not a simple stereotype, not all have changed attitudes completely but they now see him in a much more three-dimensional way - Rita Nonymouse June 15 2007

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BE SOMEONE SPECIAL FOR THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE. Be yourself was advice given to me about how I should behave on my first date with a person I really was attracted to. That really scared me for it begged the very difficult question - WHO AM I? - - - - THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A JOKE!,  - - - WHAT? YOU DIDN'T LAUGH....But seriously we all try to be someone special for that special someone and trying to match up to the image really can make you a better and more successful person. Make the effort to dress and conduct yourself well. And do keep up the effort the next time you meet. So many relationships founder because the one or both of the parties become blasé and complacent.

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Dating Scams. One of the most common scams is the one where, after the exchange of e-mails and pictures, the person asks you to open a bank account in which he or she will deposit a large sum of money, what happens next will vary from case to case but can often involves counterfeit cash. Never part with cash, if they mention cash then the probability that it is a scam is in the region of 99%.

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Make the contact yourself? or use a Dating Agency or some other means of making that first contact? Dating agencies come in all shapes and sizes and it is a good idea to check out several before you decide which one is for you. Have you tried your local supermarket?

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Another scam is 'THE HOSPITAL BILL' you have been exchanging emails and getting along well with the other party, however on the day you are to finally meet you get an email telling you that your date has met with a near fatal accident or been diagnosed with a life threatening disease and you need to send money fast.............................

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Are you sure the person you are talking to is in the Netherlands and not Lagos Nigeria, most of the scams originate from that part of the world and are perpetrated by very highly skilled professionals.

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Keep it relaxed: Your conversation should never give the other person the idea that she is being investigated. Never probe; "ve haf vays ov making you tokk" did work in the days of Nazi rule but in the dating game you should let the other person reveal themselves at their own pace. 

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USA versus Europe: If you are trying to win the heart of someone from another continent then it is as well to understand the different approaches. Northern European men are more self-restrained and expect the female to give overt signals. Southern Europeans can seem pushy but there is often a concealed shyness. With people from another culture it takes much more effort than is usually appreciated. To get to where you have good communications takes time. Communication is the key, explain what is confusing you and try to find out what is confusing your date and it will usually turn out OK in the end. Patience and perseverence are the key to success.

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Start Modestly, No need to be a big spender? Younger men often feel that they have to impress a lady on the first date. A lunch date is sometimes more revealing than theatre and an expensive restaurant. Sort out if the bill is to be shared before the meet.

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If you can't make it, be considerate: Let the other person know well in advance if you can't get there on time. If you have a busy schedule warn the other party of the risks of your being called away.

Useful Links

www.date.com The other big Dating agency, Very slick and smooth. Lots of choice
www.datingagency.com  A UK based' very popular site
www.match.com  An extremely well organized and efficient dating website.

The Megafriends Internet Dating Website:  Our sponsor, this is one of the best sites to meet people with similar interests to yourself and the special software on their site can list their members in your area or country-- 

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