A Story of Alien Abduction...
Ladies and Gentlemen, first
let me apologise for my lateness.
This time it is not one of the
usual tales of being tied down, probed and abused by little grey,
orange or silver men. My off-world experiences were considerably less
unpleasant and I was returned with quite a warm feeling to this
wonderful planet. In truth my trip was not so much an abduction as a
My experiences were
stimulating and exciting and combined the best aspects of a cruise, a
white-knuckle ride and a study trip. The planet that I visited was one
of fascinating diversity including, in places extreme sophistication
The denizens of the planet
were almost human sized and had many similar characteristics, however
it is somewhat disconcerting to have your companions alternately
hopping and shuffling along-side you
Their award ceremony was well
attended and quite amazing; there was another off world humanoid who
actually gave a little speech in the local "tongue", Being ignorant of
any extraterrestrial languages I spoke in my accented English. The
thank-you speech must have been well translated as it was well received
and given quite a noisy and lengthy applause. There was a selection of
prizes and the award that I chose was a beautifully replica of an
example of their prehistoric pottery.
The hospitality and friendship
that I was shown was almost overwhelming and during my stay I was shown
many astonishing and wonderful sights by my hosts.
The only negative aspect, if
it can be so regarded, was that my hosts were so hospitable and the
entertainment and feasting so enjoyable that I found it difficult to
tear myself away and persuade my abductors to return me to Earth. "So
that, Eminent Ladies and Gentlemen is the main reason why I am slightly
late, flustered and dishevelled on this thrilling occasion.
To be given another award so
soon after I received the last one is a first for me but an exceedingly
pleasant one. It is indeed the highest point in my life to qualify for
this prize. In my wildest dreams I would never have believed that I
would have been a recipient of the Lynton Blair prize at the 'The
International Tall Story Society award ceremony, again I apologize for
my lateness". -- Anon